x depression - how i coped with it x

Note: This is a backtracked post that I contemplated to publish because I wasn't confident about sharing. But today I thought I should.

Take one step at a time...

Depression drains your energy, hope and drive. Making it difficult to take the steps that will help you feel better.

Overcoming depression isn't quick nor easy, but it's far from impossible.

You can't simply will your one self to "snap out of it," BUT YOU HAVE MORE CONTROL than you'll ever realize.

The key is to start small and build it from there - feeling better takes time, but YOU CAN by making positive choices for yourself each day.

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Dealing with depression itself requires action, but taking action when you're depressed can be hard.

Exhaustion kicks in even at the mere thought of the things you wanna do to make yourself feel better, like spending time with friends or simply watching Netflix - making it all impossible.

Once you're down in one, it can be tough to get yourself out of a bad mood.

It not only ruin your day and make you feel awfully miserable, but with your crankiness, it may drag everyone around you down too.

Overcoming my crankiness was never easy because its been with me for a long time because that's just me - but with the depression kicking in, its worst.

There is no telling if its me or the depression taking over - like getting stuck in our forever traffic jam, walking behind some people who takes up the whole sidewalk and walking super slow (I hate it!).

Or anything small to anyone else but seems big to me are signs of mood trigger.

There are times whereby I just refuse to speak to anyone because I just don't feel like it.

Believe me when I say I have ever just lie down in bed whole day without bathing or eating or drinking - just play games.

The boys? Well, my Mom understood that phase and she'll send, fetch and settle the boys.

I'll just be the lazy cow and feed them (I am still on breast-feeding okay) while still in bed.

That's just me being me when I am lazy with depression and I am lucky enough to only be in that phase when Mom is around.

But at times, I just feel like be extra and start cleaning up like tomorrow is Hari Raya - wash toilet, spring clean everything.

This is one for the depression in me - I find ways to start helping myself overcome them.

Taking the first step is always the hardest.

Maybe, just maybe if you could lie down and play games which needs you to think, such as Block Games?

It can substantially boost your mood and energy for several hours - long enough to put a second recovery step into action - such as getting up for Netflix - which needs FOOD to lay back on the couch. So you know you gotta get up and prepare FOOD!

Bored? Call up a friend for a meetup and catch up.

By taking these small steps day by day, you will find yourself lifting the heavy fog of depression from your inner self and you'll realize how much happier you will be, healthier and much more hopeful of the upcoming days instead.

Here are the few things I do to keep my time occupied thus not allowing time for myself to be depress again and again because depression with self-healing ain't easy. I fall back in again and again not knowing that I am not allowed to be left alone not doing anything.

My choice of self-healing would be....

Spend time with #kats & The #kbrothers

I'll spend night talking to Keysha who actually, probably understand what I'm talking about to him. He'll be all that loving pet who would sit and stare into my soul (kidding), listening to my endless talking. Probably thinking if I'm going nuts. But still, having them #kats have put my sanity in place - though at times they drive me nuts to the core messing up the whole house while chasing each other. Hanging out with them (who apparently don't talk back and argue with me) helps to improve my mood too. They give me a sense of belonging, easing my stress level. Well, make sense isn't it since they're always excited to see me coming home and always patiently waiting outside the room door every night till sunrise, when everyone else is being so lame about it!

The #kbrothers on the other hand drives me into nuts but at the same time gives me assurance that I am not alone. I have someone to argue with like,

"Why is your towel on the floor and not hanged."

"Why are your toys messy and not properly kept."

"Why are the books messed up!"

"Why this and that..."

While they would reply with, "I never do! Its Papao. Its Baby." or "Sorry Mummy. I love you. Can hug me?"

Awww....

So tell me, how do I be mad for long when they melt my heart each time!

Forever arguing!

Errrggghhh.....

Pause everything and just NAP!

YES! I am falling into this mode more than often.

I could nap at anytime anywhere.

So if you do have the time to sneak away for a nap, PLEASE DO!

Your brain needs help and they are pleading for a rest.

You will wake up in a better, fun mood indeed.

Trust me, SLEEP!

Go outside and Have a Life - Play Outdoor

I love planning at least once a month, an itinerary of where to go and what to do with the #kbrothers!

Be it any activities...

Swimming

Shopping

Library

Fishing

Or just out for some window shopping - NOT, since we'll still end up shopping! Its therapeutic you know!

But please, with your own earning and not others (sarcasm intended).

Throw on something nice

Find that pretty outfit and just wear them on.

Stop wearing dull outfits!

Splash them colours - it may look funny or awful at first just like me not use to putting on RED lipstick but after awhile, HEY YO! Damn Gorgeous lah the Red(s)! *self-praising lah* Hahaha.

Stop rotting yourself on that couch with your sweatpants and dirty T-Shirts. But honestly, even though when I am home wearing as such, you know what I feel? I feel like a MAID/HELPER!

I am a wreck! Gosh!

I started getting proper home clothes and I feel better. I have the mood to actually make something today like cleaning up the house? (My OCD kicks in pretty much all over again)

Or even going out, put something nice and spat those makeups on (though most days I would be out with a bear face because I don't have the time to sit infront of the mirror for 2 hours to doll up - especially with the #kbrothers who keep calling 'MUMMY'!)

But nontheless, putting on good clothes actually boost your self-esteem and makes your brain thinks that you are in a better mood. So try it!

LOL (Yes! Laugh Out Loud)

Do anything weird and laugh it off. Like when you're in the bathroom and facing the mirror, make funny faces, chin in, make moustaches out of your bathfoams probably?

ME?

I would make use of Snapchats and make funny faces, edit them up and laugh my ass off literally so that the #kbrothers would ask me why am I laughing so hard and they wanna see what I did.

They laugh it out too and said "Mummy, you're so funny." Making it impossible for me to be mad at them eventhough they did something wrong or the house is a mess with their toys.

Flip through old photos

Try to keep only happy moments in your mobile phone so you could flip them through and run your mind back to that very moment, the fun enjoyable moments.

I have since deleted all unwanted photos especially of those a**holes who made my life miserable.

I don't need all these people anymore neither I need any memories of them be it happy or sad moments because looking at their photos only will bring my mood down or flare up for nothing. YES! That's how your mind works.

Just flip through all your teenage days photos and look at how much you have come to - those crazy outfits, those crazy hairs or even how slim you use to be, making it an inspiration to lose weight maybe?

I miss my slim body which I use to think as FAT!

Try some funky new Makeup

Well ladies, we all love makeup but for me, I am always into natural, brown or smokey look because I am afraid of putting on colours.

You see, my life with depression isn't for the better but it does reflects on the colours I choose too though I love White and Pink!

So eversince I am into #namkjourney, I have been putting on so much colours that whatever pallets I have, are now used up! Worth the spending okay! Else I would go for the dark hues only.

Would you go out with orange eyeshadows? Well I do and did!

Put on them RED SMOKING HOT LIPSTICK with funky nails homemade just like I did with the #kbrothers during one of their weekend class.

Listen to My Old Favourite Music

What's that song again? - - - - -

Bring the TEMPERATURE up everybody! Errrr, this may not be my favourite but heeeey. This was da bomb in 2006 okay!

Followed by - - - -

Like a time machine transporting you back to high school, where hopefully some nice fond memories that could bring out some positive vibes in you.

Find Your Favourite Comfort Food

What's my comfort food?

Chocolates and Sweet Food!

Never to have salad when I am in a bad mood unless that's your favourite meal - go for it if it make you feel at your best!

Milkshake should be on your list! McDonald's have them at a cheaper rate you see.

Comfort food should be something that could make you stop thinking of the problems you are facing at the moment. So go and have it!

Its no fun to be in a bad mood, but there are so many things you can do to make yourself feel better.

Do something nice for yourself especially if you're a Mum like me!

Build a Support Network

Oh well well well.

I have an amazing support group which was founded in 2017 called Yishun Mummies!

These group of ladies are so supportive and very very very understanding.

Oh, you must be wondering why its Yishun Mummies right - that's because we're all residing in Yishun (Northern part of Singapore).

We even open up a booth called YS Mumpreneurs SG - where all the Mumpreneurs in the group (basically all of us are) come together and showcase our online items.

This means forging stronger ties with Mum friends, knowing you can count on their support to understand you and to help you go a long way towards improving your depression.

Find a support group that meets your needs.

Reduce Your Stress

When you're under stress, your body produces more of a hormone called cortisol. In the short-term, this is a good thing because it helps you gear up to cope with whatever is causing the stress in your life.

Over the long run, however, it can cause many problems for you, including depression. The more you use techniques to reduce stress, the better because it will reduce your risk of becoming depressed.

Learn How to Stop Negative Thoughts

Depression doesn't just make you feel bad, it can also cause you to think more negatively. Changing those negative thoughts, however, can improve your mood.

Cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) is a type of therapy that works to alter common patterns of negative thinking called cognitive distortions in order to eliminate depression. There are also many self-help books, apps, and online courses that can help you learn how to change your unhealthy thinking patterns.

Get a Handle on Your Household Chores

Depression can make it difficult to complete household chores, such as doing the dishes or paying bills.

But a pile of paperwork, ​the stack of dirty dishes, and floor covered in dirty clothes will only magnify your feelings of worthlessness.

Take control of your daily chores. Start small and work on one project at a time. Getting up and moving can help you start to feel better in itself. But, seeing your progress in the home can be key to helping you feel better.

Create a Wellness Toolbox

A wellness toolbox is a set of tools that you can use to help soothe yourself when you are feeling down.

The tools you find most helpful might not work for someone else so it's important to carefully consider what things can help you feel your best.

Think of things you like to do when you're happy. Then, when you're feeling down, try one of those activities.

Cuddling your pet, listening to your favorite music, taking a warm bath, or reading a good book are just a few tools you might find helpful.

Create a list of the activities you might try when you're feeling bad. Then, choose an activity to try when you're having a particularly rough time.

Nurture yourself with good nutrition

Depression can affect appetite. One person may not feel like eating at all, but another might overeat. If depression has affected your eating, you'll need to be extra mindful of getting the right nourishment. Proper nutrition can influence a person's mood and energy. So eat plenty of fruits and vegetables and get regular meals (even if you don't feel hungry, try to eat something light, like a piece of fruit, to keep you going).

Identify troubles, but don't dwell on them

Try to identify any situations that have contributed to your depression. When you know what's got you feeling blue and why, talk about it with a caring friend. Talking is a way to release the feelings and to receive some understanding. Once you air out these thoughts and feelings, turn your attention to something positive. Take action to solve problems. Ask for help if you need it. Feeling connected to friends and family can help relieve depression. It may also help them feel there's something they can do instead of just watching you hurt.

Express yourself

With depression, a person's creativity and sense of fun may seem blocked. Exercise your imagination (painting, drawing, doodling, sewing, writing, dancing, composing music, etc.) and you not only get those creative juices flowing, you also loosen up some positive emotions. Take time to play with a friend or a pet, or do something fun for yourself. Find something to laugh about — a funny movie, perhaps. Laughter helps lighten your mood.

Try to notice good things

Depression affects a person's thoughts, making everything seem dismal, negative, and hopeless. If depression has you noticing only the negative, make an effort to notice the good things in life. Try to notice one thing, then try to think of one more. Consider your strengths, gifts, or blessings. Most of all, don't forget to be patient with yourself. Depression takes time to heal.

Stay in touch

Don't withdraw from life. Socialising can improve your mood. Keeping in touch with friends and family means you have someone to talk to when you feel low.

Be more active

Take up some form of exercise. There's evidence that exercise can help lift your mood. If you haven't exercised for a while, start gently by walking for 20 minutes every day.

Read about exercise for depression.

Face your fears

Don't avoid the things you find difficult. When people feel low or anxious, they sometimes avoid talking to other people. Some people can lose their confidence in going out, driving or travelling.

If this starts to happen, facing up to these situations will help them become easier.

That's all for now. Will share more when the time is right for me to do so.

Love,

N.A